Splendid Sunday

Theres so many things i want to say and shall do before halfpast, or probably 10
But first of all I need a rant
So isuccesfully got up undrew curtains, showered9leavinghairbuttakingevenlonger, bodybuttered without cacooning in town, tidyied room got dressed, came downstairs, fetched paper, emptyied dishwasher, emptyied tumbler,took towels up fileld washer and dish washer tidyied sitting room undrew curtains tidyied up and so on
Then oh yes in true style as I go to eat my breakfast dad comes down lights a cigarette starts the sighing and puts a damner on things
It just annoys me when I say what I we doing today and I get the response dunno yet
Well quite frankly its 9@13
He then pursues In making a mess, and shoving a plate in MY faceas if to say out this away
Stop pissing me off and gt out of the kitchen
Its not that I am obsessive or domineering but when I do stuff and tidy and so on I therefore think I DESERVE the most
Dad is akready angering me as we speak because his tone on the phone is just simply ridiculous, now he is going to slob over the granate oh no mum has come to hog magazines
Oh my gosh
In true style
Richard is calling in a bacon sandwich
Oh for goodness sake. Richard is ruiuning the good start to Sunday
Must not speak.
I remained calm and for that I am proud, it puts a slight dampner on things when mum reflects it onto my washing folding techniques, but as patroniinnh as it sounds she cant help it

So it’s bordering on 10 and yet again today has no plans, breakfast eaten and all of the above done
I suppose I shall crack on with the list of agendad speaks from my shower:
Motivational speeches; I don’t know if it is just me, it could well be as im a true trooper when it comes to being completely abnormally different, yet sometimes I feel my jeans and the Topshop tops in 4 different colours attire may beg to differ. But after assemblys with the darlings such as Mr Thomson, a man I will always have a fondness of, or more so recently with the speech from the man whom I felt a relation to simply because he wassomethingtodowithcrosscountry and as I do hideously boast, because my life isn’t good enough to not discuss others, Richard was’ the 4th national cross country runner for under 19’s or whatever who gave a speech referring to outwards bounds but more you can change your own life, it is only you at the end of the day, along with something like ;youmaysit there wanting and wishing you were like the people who have received all of these awards, but they haven’t got it easily, although they may be better and just doing their workand therefore achieving, no one is stopping you- my interpretation is quite mixed of this but it reflected more to the point, you don’t knoQ you can have something, and nothing is impossible, following on from this there was the lady who gave the speech *dadslightlyinterpuptedmeaskingforatap,itschillyoutsidebutishouldbeoffoutthere!) at my old school presentation evening, the one where ive possibly used my ‘rpoblem’ as a reason for really the lack of, when I oit I feel achieved and don’t mind the balance of geek.. they manage to be wealthy don’t they, anyway this lady whomelhasaskedforworkexperiencewith is a very successful person, who I just adored and admired for her attitude of dowhat your good at,don’t give up sort of speech, one thing I am terrible with is dealing with the THAT’S LIFE motto
I accept it.
Understand it
Know it
Yet simply question it, I suppose I am an overquestioner- that’s right, but why.. just because but whyyyyyyyy sort of scenario.
When I was at the ‘man’ as I call him a few monads back hed ask me why, and what would be the worst thing, and I wouldn’t know an answer, but this would anger me. What I suppose I was attempting to get at whilst I was in the shower, was that at the end of the day – I want to be successful and there are so manythings I want to achieve from life. I feel this is different than wanting the latest toy from the argos catolouge or everything other people have, another element I cant deniy.,
However last year I was indeed deep in to self criticising myself, and so sometimes I just decide Im not in the wrong its just thatpersons perception, but I know im not a bad person. I Know id never hurt someone deliberately, vandilise or so on, so what angers me the most is when people possibly insult me with things such as calling me boneidle, or even when they saythings I actually know aretrue, such as I never open the gate for mum when arrive home.. lazy, something I don’t want to be like but, I am.. and you can change things, caren’t you. I am not really sure where this is going but I suppose it can be linked to the other factor, such as the why on earth when I want to be busy and so on am I doing one subject. A result of decisions I made, and yes I do changemy mind, and it’s a bit like that consequence qhere you really need to sort it. But I am at the end of the day lazyier than those I admire: therefore im not lazy!
One factor im not sure how im going to go about is all the backlog of blogging that requires to be done,
Firstly there is Africa: I hate to admit sometimes I forget I went, and the problem is I am trying to ‘regain’ my normality of life back, yet alter it, yet get frustrated and like I always say you cant live in the past. I admit I confused myself.
Then theres the numerous trips to Aberdovey, the food I will admit.
The meetings and reflections
Apologies
Far past such as y child hood
Me a few years ago
Brief mention of you know who
The future
Now as in blogs like yesterdays one
Trying to find my self
And then ones like this one now where I attempt to balance all of those,
Well see where it goes I suppose.
Right now, I am ttothetired and upset because today looked promising.
Wham it changed.

So today wasn’t productive in that many ways I suppose
However I have tidyied around 8 cupboards in the kitchen.. resulting in a diabolically messy study of all of the very important papers mum fills EVERY cupboard with, my cookbooks now have a new home, as do my cake tins.
After porridge it was the lovely pink lady and a chocolit advent treat, mum had put bacon in for Richard.. as previously mentioned but that I was left on the side and I snacked on around a small fatty rasher with browny sauce.. strange as I usual HATE brown sauce. A fruit spice oat bisquit was also consumed, and many a other riaisn grazings.
Dinenr was soup,salad,oatcake,2 normal ryvitas,mayo..the usual.
The fridge is looking daringly bare
Mum hasn’t been shopping so we are off out for tea again
I then made my fruit cinnamon loaf.. attempting to stick to a recipe but changing it
So it went from:
To something a bit like;
# 230 g Wholemeal Plain Flour
# 85 g Brown Sugar Blend
# 2 4/5 Small Egg
# 40 g Organic Sun-dried Raisins
# 40 g dried cranberries

Well, it’s tooked up in the rayburn now.. only dilema so far
i’ve used self raising flour. wooops.

we’re off out for dinner the dog and doublet i think, so it will be beef, turkey or honey roast ham.. le menu http://www.doganddoubletsandon.co.uk/resources/uploads/files/Dog%20and%20Doublet%20Sunday%20Lunch%202010.pdf
I have put my breakfast ready in the morning so i need to sort out my hair makeup for thisevening, go and decorate the tree, cleanmy teeth and make salad for in the morning.. having no berries may be a small (major problem.
We didn’t go to the dog and doublet in the end.. it was back to the one and only red lion.
I’m really getting frustrated with how i eat when i’m not particularly hungry early on and then can’t fit as much in when we were there.
The eats consisted of
mum,muscles, leek + chilli, homemade bread.
dad- sort of parsnip and honey soupwith homemade bread
rich- wild mushroom taglitelle and a poached egg
myself – the crispy duck with thai noodle salad (me and dad alternated)
Mains, myself dad and mum went for the roast beef yorkshire and roasts classic
richard went for the seabream i induldged in last nightm but with the rissotto, which boy am i glad i didn’t ask for!
i didn’t require the extra vegetables i asked for with the main either
fo’ sho.
it’s natural reflexes i suppose for substituting the roast and yorkshires.. of which i also ate.
i for strangeness of myself, had to send it to be reheated resulting in not quite so peachy, well rosey pink perfectionit but i have some crazy thermoresistant mouth i’m sure.
the tree isn’t decorated, christmas novelty wore off, but the cake is out of the oven.
My concern over being full all the time may infact be that i am eating way more,when full and the plain old calorific things that becs really wants.
Switching of calorie scanning and planning aint going to work for some reason, as i say quite fine and dandy but one day it’s got to stop.
mum and dad had the christmas pudding and creme anglaise for desert, ofcourse i nibbled and then had some fudge with the reciept.
It wasn’t a bad evening out after all. but i definetely do hate being both hungry and full!
My brother doesn’t quite understand what a blog is, and i really don’t know how to describe one.
i’m full frumpy and have school in la morning.
hoping to get into busy bee mode
christmas cards to buy and write, gifts to chose and get, a seriously important secret santa to get, manchester to visit, sadly no jack wills for me 😦 silly! and a big weekend ahead. a to do list is in order baby.